Wednesday, January 6, 2021

Roach Control Humor


Horticulture Hotline 01/06/21

By Bill Lamson-Scribner


I was walking my dog very slowly over the Holidays, and I thought of something that was very 2020. Ol’Boy’s (my 18-year-old pound hound) walks are getting shorter in length and longer in time, so I have plenty of time to think about various topics.


For over 20 years when a neighbor of mine was out of town, I would pick up their newspaper and any occasional box and move them to their back porch. Now there seems to be regular deliveries of multiple boxes and not as many newspapers. I guess because of all these boxes, many people have cameras on their front porches. Anyway, to make a long story short, I decided to leave the boxes on the front porch because I didn’t want to be caught on camera moving them to the back porch in case someone else came along and stole them off of the back porch. 2020 – see ya!


While cleaning out a file cabinet, I was reminder why I’m a big believer in prevention and protection. I like to treat around the outside of my house for roaches to prevent them from ever entering my house.


The following is paraphrased from an American Nurseryman article dated 7/1/1989.


An Israeli women’s overzealous attempt to rid her home of a cockroach led to the hospital where her husband was treated for burns, broken ribs and a cracked pelvis.


As told in the National Arborists newsletter, the woman crushed the bug and deposited it in the toilet. However, as cockroaches so often do, this one refused to die, so the woman sprayed an entire can of insecticide in the toilet.


Her husband, unapprised of the situation when he came home, went to the toilet, sat down and lit a cigarette. After finishing it, he flicked the cigarette butt into the toilet, igniting the pesticide. Certain parts of his anatomy were burned in the resulting flames.


As for his broken ribs and pelvis… those occurred when the paramedics were carrying him out. When the paramedics learned how the man burned himself in such an unusual area, they broke into hysterics and lost control of the stretcher, adding injuries to insult.


Always read, understand and follow product label. The product label is a Federal Law.